Much Ado about Nothingness

The strange twists and turns of the demolition derby known as the Democratic primary season has left us with the heavyweight tag team from Illinois via Arkansas via New York squaring off against the former activist turned Senator from Illinois. John Edwards, whose ego-trip candidacy finally ran out of hairspray, gave up the ghost in New Orleans. This cathartic setting affords him the opportunity to foreclose on a few more Katrina victims while he is in the neighborhood and he can simultaneously arrange for “Campaign North Carolina Narcissus” to pick up the tab for his expenses! 

The run up to this point has not been without it’s innate but unintentional Democratic comedy. Obama supporter John Kerry said earlier, “being an ex president does not give you the license to abuse the truth..” I applaud the Massachusetts Senators call for the truth but I am wondering, is he THAT far behind in his reading relative to the ex President or does he suffer from “Atypical Liberal Convenient Memory Loss”? Where were these outcries for the truth when the “Old Finger Wagger” was weaving Aesop like tales over his Lewinsky liaisons under oath? Based on the Senators statement, it must be the “ex” part that now mandates this standard of veracity. (Alright, then explain Kerry’s silence relative to the crackpotterie of Jimmy “Cornpone” Carter and Kerry’s constant haranguing of W over the “truth” about the War in Iraq, but I digress.. ) Who understands better than John “Winter Soldier” Kerry that the truth is the equivalent of Kryptonite to a Democrat?

Even though the field of aspirants has narrowed to two, (three, if you count the new “Clinton umbilicus”) the constant within these variables has remained the same. Never have so many been so excited over the verbal helium of two candidates for the presidency. Why all of the nebulous obfuscation? Please keep in mind that stealth and misdirection have always been the best vehicles for forwarding the Democrats unique brand of Socialism. The true believers need nothing more than to see the capital “D” in order to line up and form the fifth column but the rest of the nation is unfortunately left to navigate the circular maze of Democratic sophistry without the cheese at the end. When properly prodded or off their medications, the Democrats will occasionally lurch into the truth. The results are often humorous and always memorable.

Take the ex President as an example. Today he said, “We just have to slow down our economy and cut back on our greenhouse gas emissions because we have to save the planet for our grand children.” Economics 101 for the ex Pres.: The election of the “Corpulent Carpetbagger” will result in the naturally occurring phenomenon known as the “Slow down of the economy”, whether anyone wants it to or not. That is what happens when Communism supplants Capitalism. If that weren’t enough, when the ex President says, “everyone knows global warming is real”, the rest of us have no choice but to question the veracity of that whole “I didn’t inhale” knee slapper.

Clinton, also in a moment of liberal foreshadowing, braced everyone for the “Default Democratic Socialist Class Separation” gambit by hectoring about the “rich countries” during his sermon. Refer to the above paragraph: Electing Rodham will assuredly create an unavoidable “Economic Terminal Velocity” for at least ONE rich country. Never mind that the Clinton’s themselves have managed to “acquire” more cash than any number of poor countries that I can think of, all under their altruistic and compassionate ruse of “public service.” Save the planet, save the whales, Free Huey, power to the people, tear the system down, blah, blah, blah. All of the sixties solipsism’s were there. The only thing missing was Wavy Gravy..

Rodham herself stumbled into a “Gary Hart” moment claiming, “I’m going to be very specific about what I want to do as President because I want to be held accountable.” First, is this “specific” thing a delayed New Years resolution, because up until now the bilge she has been unloading has been anything but specific. Secondly Ma’am, you needn’t worry about being “held accountable”, there would be no shortage of watchdog volunteers ready and willing to take you up on that if need be. We are already doing our intellectual stretching exercises.

The Clintonistas learned a lesson a week or so ago with her “Plan to jump start the economy” which would be nothing more than seventy billion dollars forcibly removed from the productive and “compassionately” handed over to the Democratic base. (The sponges.) The subject was quickly changed about twenty minutes after that “economic epidemic” was announced and the idea of anything “specific” was then expeditiously placed back on the liberal endangered species list in its usual spot along side “the truth”.

Even Obama himself couldn’t avoid a moment of inadvertent insight when he said he offered a “clear contrast on national security.” Without going into anything remotely resembling “details” (what a surprise.) we can therefore only conclude that “national insecurity” is the palatable option he will provide.

Obama even wanted the audience to imagine him with “his hand on the Bible” as he takes the oath of office. I sure hope they don’t plan on reciting the Pledge of Allegiance because we all know he has had a problem with that in the past..

Rodham between spasms over fairness and “specific goals”, found time on her campaign plane to serve peach cobbler to reporters and staffers. A few points if I could: 1) It would appear that Rodham has had a “Betty Crocker Epiphany” or her view of peach cobbler is diametrically opposed to her 1992 view of “baking cookies.” If so, did she just “Kerry” (flip-flop) on the issues of “baking cookies and having teas”? 2) Does this “carbon footprint” thing only apply to those who oppose the oppressive progressives of the Democratic Party? How many gallons of “eco friendly bio fuels” has the “Sandbagger 727” burned as it wings its way coast to coast spreading the Rodham political pollution?

The sensible among us understand fully that words have meaning. In a way, the liberals do too. That is why they specialize in using so many of them to say absolutely nothing. Rodham and Obama have managed to raise millions upon millions of dollars, garnering votes and delegates, all the while avoiding any substantive discussion of the issues of the day. I just refer to it as “Liberal Houdini Politics.”

For all of their talk of “specifics”, once the focus of the discussion ambles towards anything remotely “specific”, suddenly the topic changes and another bawdy tune emanates from the baffles of the baffling Democratic hurdy-gurdy. For all of the liberal talk of “change”, an in-depth bit of sapience into any topic would be a welcome “change” from the confusion conundrum on tap today. The only “change” a liberal is really concerned with is what they ask me for when they are mooching outside the mall..

Listening to these logic choppers is the same as a three-hour ride on a Merry Go Round. You just keep going around and around the same circle and when it finally stops moving, when the mesmeric but vacuous music winds down, everyone wobbles off and goes home a little dizzier than when it all began.

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