LA LA Land

Even though the air surrounding our country is still saturated by the political poison of the Obama Socialism (there should be a small trademark notation after that last word..) when you spend a few days in Los Angeles, you feel the need to comment upon what it was that you “saw” out there..

If you attempt to travel in L.A. by automobile, you have to understand that no matter where it is that you are going, you will probably have a better chance of getting there quicker had you left your car where it was and just walked to your intended destination.. “Directions” in this city are a nightmare of lefts and rights and u-turns and merges. These directions invariably involve taking the “the”.

As an example, “Take the 101 to the 405..” I’ve never heard “the” used as a prefix to denote numerical highways before and I believe that they should instead consider using “the parking lot” instead as the preferred highway prefix. For example, “Take the 101 parking lot to the 405 parking lot..” Actual parking within this metropolis is as difficult to find as it would be to find a person who wasn’t preposterously pretentious, socially anorexic or pieced together with substantial putties, injections and implants.. It is hard to decide which is more verboten within this region, wrinkles or personalities.

Each of these “highways” has the requisite white concrete barricades blocking off any number of inside and outside lanes, hopefully to expand each of these “euphemistic expressways” in the hopes of minimizing the twenty four hourly blockade of BMW’s and Kia’s, Rolls Royces and Ramblers.. However, I never saw anyone “working” towards this commendable but apparently unobtainable goal, behind any of these barricades, on any of these “highways”. It is as if they had completely given up on the idea, thrown up their hands without removing the concrete stanchions and gone on to another endeavor that might actually see positive results for their considerable efforts..

No one is really ever “from” L.A. The few conversations that were had out there resulted in the immediate confession that everyone was “from” somewhere else.. To be frank, most out there consider themselves too important to “talk”, thy must “text” or you must utilize the ever present cellular telephone ear piece.. You, as an outsider in their world, have no idea whether they are talking to anyone at all or whether they are merely talking to themselves.. It really doesn’t matter because the conversations themselves that you have no choice but to overhear aren’t of any importance or relevance. They just “talk” to hear themselves speak and having heard them “speak”, I can say that nothing of consequence was said.. To be quite honest, I can’t believe that that “confession” was true in every case. I would imagine that if I lived there and I were to cross paths with someone from somewhere else who had just “experienced” the full effect of the Los Angeles “crowd”, I too would claim to be “from somewhere else”..

It is all or nothing in Los Angeles. It’s either a Hummer or a Hundai. It is either a Bentley or a Corolla. It is either an Aston Martin or a Honda. There are only those nervously waiting to serve and those selfishly expecting to be served. The “middle class” doesn’t exist. It is a miserable microcosm of the “Obama America” of tomorrow..

The unfortunate thing is that the area generally has the most incredible weather nearly all year round. It seems such a waste for it to be used up upon the denizens of this domain.. The uber-wealthy can create their own “climate” from behind the walls of their compounds, so where they live and their ability to make themselves comfortable seems as irrelevant as they themselves actually are, except when the next self indulgent “awards ceremony” rolls out yet another ridiculous “red carpet”.

There was an amazing deluge of the wretched there as well. Any leisurely stroll would have you running the gamut of the “undesirables”, most of whom I would suppose would rather be “homeless” where the weather is a balmy 70 degrees than back in St. Louis where it was 97 degrees with about 70% humidity as well..

If only the nation’s homeless were made aware of this fact, we could centralize this “problem” out there and the multi millionaires of Beverly Hills could “compassionately” rectify this problem from behind the walls of their gated communities and the new homeless of Los Angeles could find themselves eating out of dumpsters much better than the ones that they are used to dining from behind the typical mid west fast food “restaurant”..

It is important to have a “reason” to go to Los Angeles. It doesn’t appear to be a place that anyone would logically want to go to without a sufficient compulsion. My “reason” was to attend the showing of a documentary at the Los Angeles film festival where my sister in law was one of the “documented”. I say “documented” because I am not sure that she would like to be referred to as a “star”. Possibly, if there is sufficient funding and interest, “Branson”, as it was titled, will be distributed to a nationwide audience. It documented the struggles of several performers in the Branson Missouri area. My other reason was to visit an artist of considerable importance to the world of art.

We met Anatole Krasnyansky and his wonderful wife Nellie at an event sponsored by an art gallery in December of last year. I had always appreciated the beauty and intricacy of his work, now the beauty and intricacies of him as a person became self evident to me.

It is not often that a man of such stature invites you to see his home and studio. It was an invitation that I did not take lightly. There are occasions in your life where you are left speechless and this was one of those moments for me.

To not only see the works of such an important artist but to hear the stories that surrounded each piece leads me to believe that Anatole Krasnyansky is an artist who carries within him, a deep and passionate meaning. This “meaning” has made its way behind and throughout every line and every brush stroke of his amazing work. He creates his works of art because he HAS TO. To see the shallow standing in a crowd just to get a fleeting glimpse of a Johnny Depp when a man of such character and consequence as Anatole Krasnyansky could walk through that same assemblage completely unnoticed borders on the criminal. Find his works and take notice..

In a land where the people all seem to be trying to “find themselves”, a place where the “lost” wear both soiled rags and prestigious Prada, a reassuring dose of humanity was found watching “Branson” and visiting with Anatole and Nellie.

If one looks hard enough, beautiful and valuable gems can be discovered within the abandoned strip mine that is La La land..


24 responses to “LA LA Land

  1. noleftturnz


    I know that this is terribly “non-political” but you can’t go to a place like this and not have it leave an impression..

    Thanks as always,


  2. Larry,
    Just finished reading Pat Buchanan’s political piece on how California now looks like what America is headed for due to it’s liberalism. As for LA, polictical science research evidences LA ranks lowest in trust among people due to it’s diversity.

  3. Margaret in CT

    Re “the” interstate highway (called The Throughway in my neighborhood), I first heard that construction during a replay of the famous O. J. Simpson chase. Al Cowlings, who was at the wheel of the Bronco, reported to the cops that they were headed south on “the” 405. That O.J. may have been trying to escape over the border didn’t sway the faithful on the jury in La La Land.

    Today in LA and throughout the country, we are having a sort of Diana-like response to the death of Michael Jackson. I see in the adulation that I have heard in the media all day something of the denial that I see in the adoration of our Peerless Leader. He’s about to destroy the country, but most people still love him. Michael Jackson backed out on tour after tour in the 90s and 00s, costing promoters millions. His personal behavior was questionable at best, and he had been turned into something of a cartoon character by the very media that now behaves as though we have lost a saint.

    The death of a person never makes me happy, but I’m wondering whether people will feel as bad about those elderly who will die because they can’t afford the power to keep them warm in the winter if the Cap ‘n Trade (such a snappy name) bill passes. Will their sacrifice at the “green” altar be noticed? I doubt it.

    Then, we have the newest member of the Dysfunctional Zipper Society, Mark Sanford. I had barely gotten over my surprise at Ensign’s behavior when this story hit the Internet. We need a vote-driven overhaul, but how can we know what lurks behind the perfect smiles of these politicians? Can we trust anyone in public life today?

  4. Amber Campbell

    I think you are a clever and witty writer! Your take on LA was right on! If you want to refer to me as a star you may. It makes me happy to know that I am a star in your eyes. Love you guys! Amber

  5. We don’t have ‘any’ “the’s” in the Capital of IL. It’s more like: ‘go over there (you can almost see it:), take a left and in one hour and 15 minutes you’ll see the Arch! Now, if you’re going to Chicago (better put a bumper shicker on of a JackAss), go over there this other direction, take a left, and when you get to the lake on the right, pull over and look at it for awhile.

    Let me know if you need some good directions to some really great restaurants.

  6. Just re-read my previous post – please remove the “it’s” between to & liberalism.

    I spent 20 years in Newtown, which is near Danbury on the boarder with New York. I left 25 years ago when the democrats took control. There are no politicians one can trust. Must be diversity working away. Barney Hot dog, Obomayomoma, Nonsensey Polisitic, Rahadama, Rangle Dangle, Barbara Briefs, etc.

  7. Hi Larry – I see that LA left an impression on you as well.

    Way back in 1980, when I was still a wet behind the ears 17-year old, my folks and I flew to Las Vegas (this was actually the first time I had ever flown before). As part of our vacation, we rented a car and drove to LA to spend a couple of days. Boy were my eyes opened!

    I’m from a very small town in coastal NC and had never seen anything like what they had out there. We made it into LA without any problems and it just so happened that they were premiering the movie Popeye with Robin Williams. My mom wanted to park the car in hopes that we might see come celebrities. At one look at some of the folks in the crowd, there was no way I was getting out of that car (I see from your adventure, LA hasn’t improved with age).

    A couple of days later, when we left to head back to Vegas, we got about 50 miles outside of town only to discover we weren’t on the right highway. We turned around and stopped several times to get directions, but no one could tell us the correct way to get out of there. We even asked a CHP motorcycle cop and he couldn’t help us. Finally we stopped at a gas station. The young man there said he didn’t know either, but he could call his dad and get directions for us. When my dad complained about no one knowing the way out of town, the young man just chuckled and said “well at least I’m not lost,” (he ended up being very nice and helpful – not a wise guy like his comment would suggest). After getting directions from his dad, it turned out that we were less than 2 blocks from the turn off to the correct highway.

    Needless to say, I was really glad to get back to Vegas. I know that sounds strange because Vegas has its share of weirdos as well, but I guess because it was smaller and easier to get around, it seemed less intimidating to me – go figure!

    Anyway, sorry to take up so much space and I’m glad you made it back safely from “LA LA Land”!

  8. noleftturnz


    Ed Debeviks? Great food and atmosphere to beat the band.

    One of my favorites there , right along side Geno’s on Superior..

    Tell me more.


  9. Larry,

    What seems like eons ago I once had a chance to go to L.A. I went. ONCE! I’d had offers to return and flat refused them all. Your more than apt description of the Carmexicofornia State was a true back then as now.

    It’s been almost a quarter of a century since my lovely bride and I parted ways. She soon re-married what I can describe as my “husband-in-law” and after a few years moved to the “quaker” state. In keeping with your description of CaLaLafornians, it’s not all that surprising looking back on it, as she was a materialistic person, wanting to keep ahead of the Joneses no matter the cost.

  10. So glad to see you back.

    Ah, California the land of make believe; where eccentricities are honored and normalcy waits in the cold, dark basement (although most homes don’t have one, so let’s say the guest house). Nice place to visit but I wouldn’t want to live there. Some area’s outside the city itself are beautiful and being an Aquarius, I’ve always have loved the ocean so when visiting I generally head there. It takes a few times to go to get a feel of the place. Like their politics it’s a required taste. Dinning is also fun. A place where you can buy a hamburger for $20.00 and the French fries are extra. There cattle must poop gold or something.

    I have a number of family and friends that live there. I was accepted to USC Film School in the late 80’s, but when the reality kicks in and we saw the cost of attending there my artist expressions were placed on a shelf. They also couldn’t guarantee I’d get a job no matter how much money I spent and the stats weren’t that good. You would be about $500,000 indebt and the chances you’d find a job would be about 100 to 1. It’s a very competitive school and everyone believes they’re the next Spielberg or Lucas. At least I know they loved my submission that got me the invite.

    The freeways are absolutely crazy where you are driving north but there signs say 405 South. Last time I went I rented a mini-van because there were 9 of us. I was pretty proud of myself that I never got lost over a ten day period. We had two natives (yeah I know weird, but yes they truly were born there and they were in there late 30”s) so I did have some help. To those who have never been there the best place to explain their lifestyle is to watch Beverly Hills Cop. When he looks around and see the plastic people driving in the Bentley or Rolls with the top down, where everyone in the car is screaming and yelling on their cell phones. We even saw a small kid, maybe 6 or 7 who had his ear to a cell phone. That was kind of wacky.

    I don’t know how those people stand the traffic, so we mostly traveled the back way through Mulholland Drive, Laurel Canyon and end up at the PCH. It’s too crowd and there are too many pushy people there, where everyone wants to be a star. You know the ones who believe they are God’s gift to mankind, where you want to push there face in the dirt. They are rude, obnoxious, and arrogant… kind of like Obama. So, that’s why they love him so much, they see themselves in him.

    It’s kind of a strange place most definitely, you can drive down Sunset Blvd and see expensive stores turn a corner and see homeless people and prostitutes. Well, I guess if you’re going to be homeless Southern California is the place to be.

    I love Anatole Krasnyansky paintings, he one of my sister’s favorite artist. I love his traditional cityscapes. Beautiful colors so vibrate and they always make me smile, unlike Picasso who gives me a headache.

  11. Eileen,

    Do you have any of his works?

    I am serious when I say that there is a story behind every brush stroke.

    Thanks as always,


  12. L.A. is no longer an original, it is an overblown caracature of itself. Hollywood “stars” no longer live there, they have a “place in the hills” and an actual residence in a state with much lower taxes to call home.

    After the Army, spent a decade in aviation services, split between L.A. and Tampa, Florida before returning home to Chicago. Culture shock? The wonderful diversity of our nation still amazes me to this day.

    The key to any “trendy” location is to get in with the “locals” or, “behind the scenes” if you will. Once you wedge into the space between the “stars and the starving” or the “vacationers and bellhops” there is always an outstanding pool of hard working, creative people who actually make anyplace much more interesting.

    Welcome home, Larry!

    Now put away your precious chotchke and get back to work!


  13. My sister has something and I don’t know what they call it. It’s a sort small poster, with a shiny surface similar to a poster and I’m sure it scaled down some. Is that a lithograph? She’s the art lover. She has a number of them from difference artist. One Christmas when my mom was still alive she asked for some art pieces. She wanted the poster thingy but my parents went to that starving art thing (where they take a up a hotel banquet hall for a weekend). Least I say she was not happy with the purchase. She never put them up and stored them in a closet somewhere. When they came to visit her she made up some excuse about where they were. My sister is stuck up snob so she fits right in with the folks in Orange County and Newport Beach. She’s in Florida now in Fort Lauderdale. Which is another wealthy community. I like art too but it doesn’t have to cost a lot to make me smile.

    One of my personal passions is photography; when he lived in NJ I had a small darkroom in the basement. It’s an expensive hobby and we had to leave my equipment behind. I love Ansel Adams. One of my favorite artist is Georgia O’Keefe, again because she uses bright colors that make me smile.

  14. I do not know why anyone would live in southern California – notably Los Angeles – who who was not condemned to. It is another Gopher Prairie, with pretentions: vulgar, materialistic in the manner of a child discovering its genitals, a labyrinth of vile roads and drivers who have clearly never heard of rain. As to Beverly Hills, it makes one think of a self-conscious, pompous – yet insecure – self-made man. It moreover is a hotbed of communistic, morally hypocritical peasants, with more money than is good for them. Does the money make them happy? Why, no. It only unfits them for their class.

  15. Larry
    did ya wear a leisure suit? LOL then you could be Leisure Suit Larry LaLa.
    I was in Mexifornia a dozen years ago – saw quite a bit of NoCal – the Bay Area (SF, Oakland, San Jose, Santa Clara, Cupertino, Alameda) then travelled south on the James Dean Hwy (that’s what I call it) and passed thru Sacramento down to Fresno. Never did make it to LA and it sounds like I didn’t miss much. If you’re ever up Toronto way let me know and I will try to give some pointers.

  16. Larry,

    You’ve been writing about the “Annointed One” so much that now you are beginning to behave just like him. There is a crisis in DC ( with the Cap and Trade , health care reform, etc. ) and just like BHO, you take off to LALA land – bet you even had ice cream !! Hey, just kidding – hope you enjoyed the good parts of CA, and that your sister-in-law’s project is a success. And, most of all, we missed your prolific wordsmithing ! 🙂

    I have a few family members who moved , many years ago, from the east coast to CA. Half of them have since returned, although a nephew just moved there this past year – we’ll see how long he stays. I’m personally not attracted to a place known for earthquakes, wildfires, mud slides, and strange people .

    On the plus side, we don’t have to worry about ACORN anymore, since it will no longer exist. Or, so they would hope that is what we will believe – a name change makes everything OK . . . NOT . I’m waiting for another name change . . . . “former president Obama”,

    “How can so few cause so much damage?”

  17. Welcome back Larry….a lot happened while you were gone.
    I actually know some ordinary people who live in Orange. A friend who decided to stay after his stint in the Navy. Met and married a wonderful girl from Bellflower born and raised in Northern California (as different as a Miamian and a Panhandle Cracker.)
    While I’ve been to LA a number of times, my first trip was the most memorable. Did the tourist thing around LA, Bear Mountain, drove to Northern California via the ocean highway. Ate our way through San Francisco, Alcatraz, lots of chocolate, street car rides, more eating.
    Nearly died snowmobiling, just a wonderful adventure had by all.
    On another trip I got lost leaving LA driving to Vegas….had an equally frustrating experience with directions. The beauty of the desert made it worthwhile.
    In all north of LA is beautiful. North of San Francisco the people are nicer and more normal.
    I suspect the reason there is no middle class is…they can’t afford to live there. If your poor you are either homeless or on the dole.

  18. The people in California have lost their minds in a somewhat comical way. Recently they voted down anymore new taxes on the already overtaxed citizens. But, when the Governorator tried to cut any social programs and projects they were up in arms. They told him to leave them just as they are with no cuts. So, then who will pay for these social programs? I guess they think the rest of America should to make an “investment” in the California’s future. They already “borrow” their electricity from the surrounding states and pay through the nose for that privilege.

    I have a friend who lives in San Jose and her families electric bills look more like a house payment. On the average monthly electric bills run between $600.00 to $ 700.00 and they unplug most appliances when not in use with the exception of the refrigerator. When she told me this I was floored. So I asked why. According to her the citizens in CALIFORNIA borrow from Nevada and Oregon to get their electric to save their own state from building anymore Pacific Gas & Electric Company plants. They are also paying for the lawsuits that they lost that occurred in the 1990’s. She’s happy to pay those high bills just so they can save California’s wild life and countryside from an evil and ugly PG&E plants.

    This is the mentality from the clean, global warming buffoons that live in that state. It’s fairly similar to what happened on Long Island where I grew up until the age of 12. They built a plant that was never allowed to open and our power bills reflected that cost for building and not using that facility. We got out just in the beginning of electric bills started increasing and some were happy to pay for the additional cost in the Liberal landscape.

    They want to save their state at the cost to the rest of America. They only worry about themselves but encourage other states to do the opposite. Build you’re plant and let us have your energy. The same holds true for drilling oil. They won’t have to look at the platforms in their ocean but don’t care if Oregon or Washington State do, yet they want there oil. It’s quite a quagmire and certainly hypocritical of Californian to place any damages and danger of others outside their state. Very big of them.

    When in California in the mid 1996, my girlfriend’s parents owned a beach house in Malibu (but not in the celebrity area). It was a fairly nice 2 story large duplex home and they rented the other home out. It had a number of bedrooms and bathrooms it was a really nice house and I didn’t understand why they didn’t live their full time; they certainly had the room (then we visited her parents real home that overlooked the city of Los Angeles just off Mulholland Drive. Beautiful home, landscape and view)

    During the first night we stayed at the beach house I woke up at 5 am and decided to go for a walk on the beach so as not to wake up the others staying in the house. Another east coaster joined me. We kept looking at the black stuff on the beach and wondered what it was. Come to find out it was oil residue from the off shore drilling which ended up on the bottom of my feet. So all those self absorbed celebrities who are also environmentalist are somewhat hypocritical when she told me the rest of the information.

    Malibu knew they needed to build a new waste dump to have a place to send their sewage/excrement but they turned down building anything that may block their view of the ocean and beaches. Over the years the waste from an already over burden dump site had hit it’s limit and was starting to overflow into the Pacific Ocean which was intermingled with the oil sludge. That part floored me. They complained about the oil barges and have picketed oil companies who have drilled off the California beaches but seem fine with a backed up sewer system because its natural unprocessed waste. I wonder what they’ll do when the sewer sludge gets into their water system (there’s a joke in there somewhere about eating ones own shit)? No wonder you never see many of photographs of celebrities frocking in the surf.

  19. Updated article on Sonia Sotomayor and new sweeping legislation from backdoor Barney. They will never learn will they??

  20. Larry:

    As far as I’m concerned, there are too many “left turnz” in LaLa Land. Some comedian once said “California is like a bowl of granola: fruits, flakes and nuts.” Unfortunately, they seem to outnumber the normal decent people.

    My mother went on a cross country bus trip in the 1980’s and spent a few days in California. There was a strong tremor the day they were leaving and some nuts in a pickup truck tried to run the tour bus off the freeway. The bus driver managed to keep the bus on the road and the truck ended up off the road instead. The two idiots in the truck were last seen screaming, yelling and shaking their fists at the bus. It’s not a good idea to play games with a vehicle that’s bigger than the one you’re driving.

    I’ve never really had the desire to visit the place myself; I can think of a lot better places to go but I’m glad you enjoyed yourself and managed to get away for a few days.

  21. noleftturnz


    I recieved a particularly nasty email relative to this article.

    I feel that such bile isn’t something that the readers of this site should suffer. If anyone disagrees with that sentiment, let me know and I will allow every one of them to pollute the “comments” section making this another Human Events type of site.

    I’ve explained before that I try to “haul up” when I get to about 1,000-1,500 words per article. Believe me when I say that in almost every case, I could extend each to 2,000-5,000 words..

    In doing so, some things are left to the “directors cuts” of the articles. The biggest portion of this material from this article I will add below just in case the “reader” who regaled me with his opinions might still be around..

    Perhaps this should have been included in the published piece. I thought that the sentiments were obvious to anyone who lives within a major metropolitan area.. This was actually the second to last paragraph of the article..

    “There were a number of very “real” people in Los Angeles. They and their efforts are unfortunately overwhelmed and overshadowed by the ostentatious and their groupies and by the shallow and the conspicuous. They are the ones waiting to park someone’s car or to take someone’s “order”. Every city has such virtually “invisible” citizens in it, folks who are not unlike me. However, these folks seemed to stand out in a city like Los Angeles all the more. They perform their jobs with a quiet professionalism, content in the knowledge that regardless of their pay, they refuse to be anything other than thorough in dealing with the task at hand. They are seemingly silent within a city that is driven by the egotistical.. ”

    Thanks as always,


  22. Larry:

    I reread the article and I can’t figure out what could have produced the “bile”. Personally, I am quite happy to have you monitor this site. One of the main reasons I love NOLEFTTURNZ and the family is that we can express our opinions without attacking one another. On other sites I have visited, I have been called a ‘crank”, among other things, for merely stating my opinion. If someone wants to disagree, that’s fine just as long as they do it civilly. It appears that the “bile” producer has a very thin skin. We have enough pollution in this country we don’t need it here.

  23. Enjoyed your take on LA – spoken like the true outsider and anti-Californian! But I can relate: I’ve been here in SoCal since the early 1990s (but not in LA – I live in the Desert, which is damn hot now, but still beautiful in its exotic way) and STILL do not consider myself a Californian! I was orig. from the Pacific NW (Seattle); and although I’m now definitely a fair-weather friend, I still think of the Great Rain Forest as my “home.” Just love all the conveniences for which CA is justifiably well known.

    When I do go into LA, however, I go for a specific purpose – usually to see something wonderful at the Music Center (Ahmanson, Chandler Pavilion, or Mark Taper Forum), head direct to the parking garage (my car can almost find it automatically!); then, when the show’s over, I get back in my car and onto the Freeway (“the” 101 – South, in my case, but “south” feels like “north” sometimes, so I know what you or one of your posters experienced!), just a couple blocks from the Center. Then I head East to the Desert – basically avoiding all Angelinos except those who are going to the same show!

    That’s the only way to “do” LA these days. I’ve met my match: The constant traffic – which is virutally non-existant in our part of the world – is a reall bummer and not worth the hassle.

  24. yeah, and the Liberals want the rest of America to be just like California.


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