Yesterday, both John W. and Richard said that they would vote for me for president. Lets take the “news” of today and lets suppose that I was asked a question about the deficit and the economy. Lets see exactly what my “exploratory committee” would be in for..
“..As of today, as of this minute, the Obama deficit will cost every man, woman and child $41,300.00.. Tomorrow that amount will be higher. Actually.. The amount just went up as I was speaking. This is the sad reality of allowing the liberals to have the keys to the cash register.
The Obama deficit is as dangerous as the Obama unemployment and both are considerably more dangerous than global warming and the H1N1 hype.. When you find yourself saying that the Obama deficit and the Obama unemployment are the “highest ever” or the “highest in decades”, the time for blowsy talk is over.. The deficit alone isn’t the problem. It’s the double-edged sword of the Obama deficit and the interest accrued. Here is my plan which hasn’t been run past my economic advisers, Dr. Thomas Sowell and Dr. Walter Williams, so this one is on me..
A tourniquet needs to be applied immediately. The challenge appears daunting, but this is America. We survived Pearl Harbor, we survived September 11th, we will survive Obama..
Obama has decided to make everyone in America a “victim”. The only people left out are those here illegally because they are here benefiting from the benevolent ATM machine that liberal politics has created.. As an aside, any ILLEGAL ALIEN who encounters law enforcement will be exported immediately. Amtrack is a government program and where applicable, they will do the hauling. Where Amtrack won’t work, the offending nation will be billed for services rendered and their citizen will delivered as inexpensively as possible, preferably to the nearest UN consulate representing the illegal’s home country..
We have no choice but to look at that $41,300.00 figure and to deal directly with it. The “victims” here in America have to staunch the Bolshevik bleeding. WE will have to pay for the liberal carelessness now or later, but pay for it we must. Every American has been saddled with the Obama deficit and all that it entails. Every American now owes some foreign government, here is what we should do.
We will create the “Rescue America From Liberal Tyranny” fund. Again, thanks to Obama, you owe $41,300.00.. Anyone who commits to pay back the “Obama deficit”, will have the amount that they will need to forfeit “frozen” at the point of participation. For example, if “today is your day”, your “Obama Deficit Burden” is locked in at $41,300.00 and it will never go up. Tomorrow, that number will be higher.. Re-payment benefits are on a sliding scale. Liberal “benefits” penalize the responsible, my benefits “reward responsibility”..
An immediate payoff gets the “Obama Bailout Hero” a FOUR YEAR tax immunity. You will pay no taxes of any kind for four years. No personal property tax, no license taxes, no sales taxes. NONE. You will be issued a conservative EBT card. (End Bolshevik Taxes) No federal, state or local taxes will be collected from you for FOUR YEARS. Just “show your card”.. No IRS, no nonsense, no lie.
You will be allowed to “invest” your reward where YOU see fit. Invest in a 401k, the stock market, a new small business, a vacation, or a new roof. The money belongs to YOU, not the government.
A family of four has been unnecessarily burdened by the Obama Deficit to the tune of over $165,000.00. This is a considerable albatross courtesy of the Demokrats. Paying back the Obama Deficit will be adjusted relative to the size of your family. A family of four or more paying back the Obama Deficit in four years or less is still entitled to the full FOUR YEAR “Freedom” package as well. An ascending and descending scale will be created based upon whether the victim of Obamanomics is single, married, married with children, etc. All of those “Heather has Two Mommies” “families” are all “equal” as far as paying back the Obama Deficit goes.. The LEAST that any Obama victim will be entitled to for “Saving America From Fiscal Fascism” will be ONE YEAR tax free.
We have to begin seriously lowering the Obama Deficit. We certainly need more talented accountants in Washington and less lawyers.. The IRS agents who might otherwise have found themselves furloughed will be responsible for the “Obama Deficit Payoff” funds. We will constantly be negotiating interest rate changes with the nations that hold the nation’s children’s futures in their hands and any concessions that are won will be passed on to the “Obama Deficit Heroes”. Those fully paid will receive an immediate refund and those making longer payments will have their payments reduced accordingly.
Those entitled to a refund can, if they choose, allow it to go towards the Obama Deficit Payoff and they will be afforded additional “tax free” time on their EBT card.. The difference here is that the taxpayer can “choose” this option. This will be removed from the “liberal governmental endangered species” list as no one had such choices under the Obama caliphate..
Obamanomics dictated, literally, that the American family “tighten its belt”. Now the working, tax paying public has the right to say to its government and its representatives, “now its your turn”..
Businesses can also contribute on behalf of their employees who will earn them tax-free status so that they may invest in expansion and the hiring of new employees. I would never demand that Americans “buy American” but we need to see the “Made in America” sticker more frequently. I would certainly hope that Americans would consider “American made” products first as America benefits in a number of ways from a strong and solid manufacturing base. Lets stop bankrolling our enemies..
ALL able-bodied recipients of ANY governmental stipend under the Obama administration will need to justify the taxpayers “investment” in them. The infirm and the elderly will always be taken care of. The liberal entitlement and handout hootenanny days are over.. I am sorry folks, entitlement, what a horrible word.. Americans are “entitled” to what the Constitution guarantees them, the rest comes from the guarantees that always come from hard work and individual effort. I will NEVER guarantee the “equal outcome”, I will guarantee the “equal opportunity”.
The days of rewards for irresponsibility are gone. If it is a financial hardship to raise children without the unlimited assistance of the government, then stop having so many of them. If you cannot afford the house payment that was gifted to you by the “fairness” programs of another liberal from the past, move to a smaller home or move into an apartment. Again, the Constitution does not guarantee anyone a home. There is no “free” anything anymore. Those who need their housing, their groceries, their gas bills, and their cable or satellite bills covered by their neighbors will be punching a time card for forty hours a week for the “Recover From Obamanomics” program. There will be no more of this “jobs Americans won’t do” malarkey any longer.. Those who insist that they “can’t find a job” will have their “Obama benefits and handouts” taxed at a rate of 100 percent..
I see the red light going off again, I knew that I would end up going long on that one..